Yesterday was a rough day. I was in an I MISS HOME place all day, and nothing could break that funk. So I thought today, since I'm crawling back out of that hole, it would help to get out all the things I miss and see what there is here to satisfy me until I can visit in June.
The people in the picture here are at the top of my list, of course. This was taken well before Joy, but I can imagine her sitting in Dave's hands, feet smacking him in the eyes. Or in the crook of my father's arm, because like her mommy and her auntsie she finds that man irresistible when it comes to hugs. Hoyt Allen gives the best hugs!
Anyway... My family is at the top of the list of things I miss. I can call them whenever I like, but I find myself not doing so because sometimes hearing their voices only accentuates how far away they are. Next in line? My friends...you all know who you are. I want to be having Chik-Fil-A or on my way to Tako Sushi with a grumpy bloodhound puppy. I want to be sitting in a hotel room in San Antonio looking through the RID program book. I want to see the fairy lights in Greenville. I want to raise my hand to the "bings" on MARTA. I want to walk from the Courthouse to downtown for lunch.
I miss my car. I miss my dryer. I miss my dishwasher...good LORD do I miss the dishwasher.
I even miss Days of Our Lives.
The worst part, I think, and the part that is going to take the most soul searching and the most improvement on my seriously underdeveloped ability to communicate is that there is no one here that I can talk to...no one that has been where I am, knows who I am and where I've come from, who can be there with that background to tell me it will get better. Sometimes when I'd finished a bad assignment or was having an I'm A Bad Sister/Sister In Law/Daughter day back home I'd think how nice it was going to be to have a clean slate in England.
Clean slates are great, but they can be lonely. But I'm climbing back out of my pity pit, and I should be back to normal very soon. Then I can file posts like this away and enjoy my new home...hopefully.
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2 comments:
You know there is actually a person who knows exactly where you are, where you've been and how much it sucks to miss home and feel like you're alone in a country where, even though there's a common language, cultural references can make it feel quite alienating.
It's too bad there's been a relationship fail.
Yes, that is too bad. I can only hope that time will heal it, because as with most relationship problems that is the only thing that works. Painful as it is at times, you just have to give it space and hope it will work itself out to some level of civility at least and eventually friendship again at best. It is what it is.
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