The Tale of the Tennis Ball

I was framed. - Willow-Pickle

So the temps and the sudden onset sideways rain that we have here during Summer in the Southland makes for dreary days for the Dunne Dogs. Today, though, there was a bit of excitement.

(This is long...but I think it's entertaining.)

I let them both out and for a change let the resident Old Bird Willow out into the backyard. Her arthritis in her back legs has removed her Flight Risk designation and she normally goes unleashed to the front yard, does her business, and toddles back inside. (If you knew her when she was younger, before both knee replacements, you know why this 💔 a bit.)

In the fenced yard was a gift bequeathed upon His Grace, Sir Stanley the Cautious, from his favourite human alive: his Daddy. It is a GIANT DAY GLOW KONG TENNIS BALL, and it is Stanley's precious. He barely squeaks it as he runs around the yard with utter joyful abandon, as if he knows what a fleeting thing a squeaker in a dog toy can be. He gallups like the blessed bow-legged creature he is, scoops it up, and runs at what full speed would be if he didn't have back legs periodically go akimbo. 

It makes me love him even more to watch. 

Remember I said Willow was in the yard today? With the delicacy and stealth of a HEAT/TENNIS BALL SEEKING MISSLE, she scuttled across the grass and scooped it up. It is nearly the size of her noggin, so it was easy for me to retrieve as Stanley stood by, watching and worrying. 

The first time, anyway. 

I threw it for him and he took a victory lap before dropping it for me to throw again. This time it threw it just out in front of Willow and she toddled over to claim it before making a sharp turn back toward the house. This lady was taking her toys and going home. I intercepted and threw a belter for Stanley to chase and retrieve. Such a happy boy! This went on for two more rounds until Willow figured out the game and how to cheat.

On round four she chomped down on that ball and I could swear I heard the life go out of it in one prolonged squeeeeeeeeakmmfphh. Again, her trajectory was the house and she was off like...well, not a shot but there was some pretty determined scuttling. I grabbed the ball, tilted her head up to look at me, and gave her the command to drop it. She went 💯 terrier and doubled down. Air hissed from the tennis ball. 

A tennis ball, I might add, that was made by Kong. Dog owners, iykyk. 

Again with the scuttling to the fence. At one terrifying moment, Stanley ran up to sniff his poor precious tennis ball. She didn't growl but she also didn't stop. My sweet house horse looked back at me like HELP, MOMMY and I forgot myself. I caught up to her and grabbed the ball, trying to pry her jaws off it. 

Y'all, don't do that. What do you think will happen when the ball moves around in her mouth? It certainly isn't that she holds her jaws open for you to remove the ball. 

Lucky for me and my fingers, the ball didn't budge. I opened the gate and she trotted happily toward the house. Stanley followed her, keeping a respectful distance. We got inside and I grabbed one of the triaged toys on top of the fridge that she has ripped open (it's awaiting sutures) and took it over to trade. Finally, it worked and I was fast enought to snatch the ball and the toy from the Jaws of Madness. 

The toy was returned to the fridge and I had the ball. Stanley sniffed it and looked up at me like this: 🥺 It was flattened with a hole on one side. I managed to un-flatten it and presented it again. He sniffed it, then took it, and after a much-diminished victory lap he stopped at the kitchen door, ready to go out again. I opened the door and my sweet boy went to the gate, then into the backyard and he danced, wagged, and then dropped the ball to go back inside. He put his toy back where it belonged!

Willow stayed indoors to sulk, obviously. I've gotten loads of side-eye and loud, annoyed sighs, and she has finally dozed off again. 

Welcome to life with the Dunne Dogs. 😂❤️