14 August 2007

Over one million insomniac minutes served...

When you purchase your allergy medicine and you decide on the store brand because it is a bit cheaper than the real thing, please make sure that it's not the kind that dissolve in your mouth NOR the 24 hour non-drowsy kind. I mean come on, 24 hours of non-drowsiness?

I've had insomnia something AWFUL off and on for about two weeks now. Not so much while I was in San Francisco but I think that I was just exhausted then. But just before I left and now that I'm back I don't even get TIRED (with or without a nap, doesn't seem to matter) before 11:30pm and lately haven't been falling asleep before 1am. That doesn't work so well when one has to be up at 6:45am the next morning.

So as I'm about to pop my allergy pill in my mouth I notice that the box says something about dissolving...pop pill, drink water, turn over box. Oh, look at that. Fast dissolving, non-drowsy, something about 24 hour relief. Hmmm. Here's hoping it will do what all the other "non-drowsy" antihistamines do and zonk me out...but so far no good.

Ugh. I guess I could do my dishes.

12 August 2007

Three years old and the light bulb hasn't switched on just yet...

Today the Leelos (Daisy's litter)turn three years old, and yet my Daisy is still very much a puppy...God help me. Their birthdate on Greyhound Data is 8/14, but I remember it to be the 12th because I was among the folks on GreyTalk "watching" them be born.

wmlcml6 Posted: Aug 12 2004, 09:37 AM
"Baby Daisy has arrived. 9:37 am EST!!!! Leelo is a fantastic mom so far. I think she is a fawn, but is kind of wet and dark right now."

So happy third birthday to my beautiful and perfect Puppy-Girl who will always be my puppy girl, no matter how old she gets...my Daisy Mae Mae...

Happy birthday to Casey and Bonnie...to Angel Sophie Sox...to the ever handsome Dodger Long Legs...to Hallie Jalepeno, the firecracker mountain goat...and of course, Windy-Bear, the first of the LBs to discover what retirement is like...

Daisy, I'm so glad you were born and even more glad that you're mine. If the rain stops today we might go take a little walk downtown later. If not, we'll snuggle on the couch and watch movies and I'll tell you over and over how much I adore you, just so you won't forget.

Happy birthday, my precious PuppyGirl...
love, Mommy

10 August 2007

On Families and Over-reacting

I've been thinking a lot in the past few days about what the word family means. I've spent a lot of time with my family and have come to several realizations.

You may not be in the same geographical area with your family, but you are still a part of it. My cousin Carol made that point quite well when she spoke at my aunt's funeral. One thing my aunt loved were children, and since she didn't have any of her own she more or less "adopted" me and my sister and our seven cousins. We weren't always right there with her, but she never forgot a birthday or an anniversary. She made arrangements to attend plays, musical recitals, and other important events. I would imagine that it means even more now to my sister that she was at Susan's ordination as a minister.

I'm not sure which stage of grief I'm in at the moment, really. I think it's anger. I have some very clear opinions about the series of events leading to my aunt's death, and while I won't stoop to the level of some and point fingers I will say that I think had one particular thing not happened my aunt would still be with us. Am I delusional with grief? Possibly, but I don't think so. Am I looking for a scapegoat? Possibly, but I don't have to look very far.

I have to hold to my belief that what goes around comes around, and that the deeds that may have hastened my aunt's death if not caused it outright will be rewarded in kind. It's funny, my sister and I differ on this...while she is able to hold her composure in check and never stoop to their level, I'm staring people down at the funeral and just waiting for my chance to express how I'm feeling. (ex: I told my mother that if a certain person said boo to me, "it's on.")

What has become apparent is that I have neglected my family. One of my father's sisters actually said to me that she thought I was a stranger to them. While that might be a bit of an exaggeration, it holds some truth. I've been told in the past few days that I over-react to things that happen to me and maybe that's true, but I react to things following how I feel. While that particular person can't possibly know how much my aunt meant to me and how tough this past week has been, he has let me know how I come across to others, and that's what I need to keep in check.

Man. What a week.

04 August 2007

I know a woman

I know a woman who was as tall as a tree, or at least seemed that way to me when I was a little girl.

I know a woman who knew everything there was to know in all the books in the world, because she worked with CURRICULUM, or at least that's how it seemed when I was a little girl.

I know a woman who loved children, even children who did bad things like take the batteries out of her clocks or not eat all their green beans or talk during the church services at camp meeting, not that I ever did any of that when I was a little girl.

I know a woman who was devoted to her family, especially her little brother, and who was an example to all those that knew her of what faith was and meant.

I know a woman who was a breast cancer survivor.

She was the same woman that let me walk behind her while she picked beans out of the garden, feeding me one or two raw because I wanted to know what they tasted like without cooking. She was the same woman that made me purple cows to drink (Welch's grape juice and milk with a dash of vanilla ice cream, don't knock it till you've tried it!), and always remembered that I was the one that liked apple pie while my sister was the one that liked pumpkin pie.

I know a woman who had strong hands that would gently hold my tiny little girl's fingers in hers. I remember tracing the outline of the logo on her signet ring, and thinking when I got my own Maryville College ring that it made my hands look a lot like hers...only not so strong.

I know a woman that was stubborn, independent, and is now free. She's free of a body that wasn't working as it should. She's free of worry. She's free of pain.

I knew a woman, and she was my father's sister, my grandmother's daughter, my mother's sister-in-law, and my aunt. I love you, Aunt Inez and while my heart is breaking for losing you it is also singing that I got the chance to know you, learn from you, and be loved by you.

It's just turned dark here in San Francisco, so I'll look for your new star in the night sky.

This is for Katy.

-Registration was a breeze. Pre-registration is the way to go.

-I clearly need someone to look after me when it comes to arriving at the airport on time. Larry the Cable Guy that I sat next to on the way to San Antonio (after arriving at GSP at O Dark Thirty) was nothing compared to the poor folks that have to work at Hartsfield and deal with shmucks like me that arrive at baggage check two minutes after their plane is done accepting checked baggage.

-I made it to the opening ceremony, and saw everything from the Village People to men in drag SIGNING Dude Looks Like a Lady. Top drawer, foh-sho.

-It has been ten years since my first RID conference. I think I'm now easing into the category of interpreters with salt and pepper on their heads. (think of that one in ASL, it will make more sense)

-I miss my roommate. It's not the same. Think Kurt will send ME roses this year? :)

Just kidding, I'd be totally mortified if he did. :D Simon, on the other hand...doesn't read my blog. Anyway...

I have NO idea what time it is...my watch and laptop say that it's 12:34 am. My blackberry says that it's 9:34 pm. The part of my brain that lives in Yorkshire says that it's 5:34 am tomorrow morning...but I'm not sure what day that is, really.

It's going to be a good conference, and I'm sure that my workshop will be fine.

This is for Katy.

Philly in 2009, baby!!!

03 August 2007


Twas the night before conference and all through the manse
Not a human was stirring, they all seemed in a trance.
While Davey snoozing on the four poster bed,
Our Susan had visions of Days in her head.
My case was all opened, it covered the floor!
My laptop a humming, plugged in near the door,
I sat on the bed, wishing dearly for sleep
But it came not, not even after I'd counted sheep.

Why was I nervous? What could be the matter?
I'd spring from my bed, but that would cause a clatter.
So I'll sit here and surf, the internet awaits
Till my alarm sounds in five hours, the sound that I hates!

Yeah, why am I still awake, and further, writing bad poetry? 8 hours from now I'll be on a plane, headed for San Francisco to the RID, Inc conference where I'll be with people like me...people that get me...people that live the double life I lead as an interpreter...and I'll have to stand up in front of them and give a presentation when my mind is still in Georgia, Alabama, and South Carolina...with my aunt, my dogs, and my new job, rather than focused on Interpreting for Deaf Professionals in Clinical Settings. As Liz says from time to time, Oh, the GLAMOUR!

Maybe if I had this curling iron masquerading as a laptop off my legs I could actually get some sleep...Next post from San Fran!

(or at least from the airport...)

01 August 2007

And then there was one.

One critter in the house.

It's just me and Mills tonight. The dogs have gone to Krista's to stay while I go to RID this coming Friday. This conference is a lot of things...a chance to see old friends, a chance to learn the latest and newest and coolest and craziest about my profession, a chance to get up in front of a bunch of my peers and hopefully sound like I know what I'm talking about...but it also marks the two year anniversary of Brave Lettuce. I started this blog two years ago at the RID conference and haven't looked back. For those of you still chewing on your lettuce leaves, thanks.

One blog post down the drain.

As happens often for me, I had a great blog post in my head while driving home tonight. After getting the dogs to their Aunt Mary who would take them on to Krista, I drove up to the hospital where my parents were taking their turn sitting with my aunt. I had a great post brewing and of course, now it's gone.

One more night without sleep.

It will take me awhile to wind down after driving. If I can be in the bed by 2am (half an hour from now) I will count it a good night and be satisfied. That means five whole hours of sleep before the alarm goes off to get me up to ring Simon on his lunch hour at work.

One moment when I realized I'm a grown up.

One moment where I saw how much my father loves his sister.

One moment where I looked at my aunt but saw my grandmother, some twenty-four years ago, lying in a hospital bed, dying, not knowing who I am.

One moment where I realized that there is nothing more important than family.

And then there was one...just one me, here in my house with my noisy cat and a computer screen.

Music Monday: Still Unwritten

This has been a weird couple of days, culminating in Music Monday almost being forgotten. Last Thursday I went to my appointment with "...